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By Koblowe Obono and Oka Obono
Introduction Socialization of sexuality in the family varies according to the sociodemographic characteristics and cultural background of parents and children. Differences are grounded in a gender-based division of labour. These values are transmitted to young people during sexuality socialization, learning what constitutes reality-the basic schemes used for understanding the social and physical world. Through interaction, children acquire sexuality knowledge - norms, mores, attitudes, beliefs - and behaviour that are culturally acceptable. Socialization of boys and girls is thus essential for the renewal of culture and perpetuation of society. Individual and society are dependent on socialization. The paper presents scientific findings on the socialization of children in Ugep through gendered division of labour.
Foundations for Sexuality Socialization
Socialization of sexuality is an important aspect of the development of the child. This is because s exuality is a central aspect of being human throughout life and socialization occurs throughout one's life . Parental socialization is necessary as children begin learning early in life. They learn about their sexuality in the first months of life when they notice pleasurable areas on their own bodies [1]. W ith the opening of the eyes, babies understand the difference in being female or male. During this phase , adults have strong influence in shaping children's ideas, values and beliefs to conform to cultural prescriptions. Parents most often at this stage provide early modeling achieved through conditioning or observational learning . Young person's interaction with others provides opportunities for growth and development in relationships and sexual expression.
Growing, children begin to develop sex role identities and preferential play activities based on their identification as boy or girl. They learn social norms around sexuality. Parents provide early guidance but peers and the media expose them to other sexual values. Information by parents is to protect children from sexual harm. Meanwhile, the socialization of boys and girls differ in content, structure and function.
Human socialization presupposes an adequate genetic endowment and environment. Verbal and nonverbal communication enables the transmission of information, ideas, attitudes, and mental states to others. The production of meaning is achieved through the use of understandable symbols during interaction. For Symbolic interactionists, such reflexive behaviour facilitates the development of the self and perpetuates culture. The definition of the situation influences the construction of reality through the interpretation of meaning given to immediate circumstances. Gender power relations within marriage, particularly the degree of dominance and asymmetry, determine the role of spouses in the management of household resources and children [2].
Methodology
The study was conducted through the survey method and complemented with focus group discussions (FGDs) and in-depth interviews (IDIs). The combination of qualitative and quantitative methods permitted the extraction of descriptive, narrative and analytic information used to gain deeper understanding of the phenomena. Qualitative methods focused on understanding the phenomena within their naturally-occurring contexts and teased out meanings from discussants. The survey instrument (the interview schedule) provided data on sexuality socialization practices of parents in Ugep, Cross River State.
Result
The study revealed that mothers play a greater role in the sexual socialization of girls. Most respondents (77.4 percent) noted that mothers moulds the sexuality image of daughters and determine girls' sexuality through discussion. Results portrayed a great gender-based socialization process in which there is little sexuality communication between girls and their fathers. Traditional gender constructions and social norms hinder sexuality socialization through fathers. Gender-role attitude is significantly associated with sexuality communication [3] and matters only for discussing sexuality with specific members of the family.
Girls in FGDs noted that fathers mostly discuss issues like education and career aspirations rather than sexuality. They described fathers as having less time to discuss because they associate the role with mothers. Reasons provided include: daughters are closer to their mothers, mothers are more at home to educate girls, same physiology and society has designed it so. IDIs with women explained:
It is difficult for a man to discuss sexuality with his daughters. There are very few men that have this kind of time. All the work is done by the mother because the daughters are closer to their mothers. The society looks up to the woman to bring up her daughter in the right way in order to bring respect and honour to her family. We tell ( socialize ) them as early as possible how to behave... We take this seriously because when the girl becomes bad, people will blame the mother, not the father, for not training her daughter.
Another woman added:
Fathers will say "it is the duty of the mother to talk to the daughter because it is not my concern". Fathers are not so eager because they see this as a woman's responsibility. They feel the mother knows better what goes on with the girl... She has to tell her daughter how to behave and also to inform her that as she is maturing, she may be pregnant or get sickness if she sleeps around with men.
Sexuality socialization is a mother's responsibility according to fathers. Since mothers and daughters have the same sexual features, it is easier for them to understand themselves on sexuality. A father stated:
Mothers should discuss more frequently with daughters because both of them are females and so would understand each other easily
This statement is rooted in biological determinism and functionalism theories. Sociological perspectives offer interpretations of gender stratification and roles that resemble and parallel their positions. The Functionalists suggest that families are organized along instrumental-expressive lines, with men specializing in instrumental tasks and women in expressive tasks. Gender roles can be seen as arising from biological development or cultural contributions. Biological determinists stated that because women are biologically different from men, some of the roles they perform also differ. However, there has been some disagreement about the exact nature and consequences of this difference. Parsons characterizes the woman's role in the family as expressive, providing warmth, security and emotional support. These attributes are essential for effective sexuality socialization of the young.
Discussion
Differences occur during sexuality socialization. For mothers, the topic of menstruation is a natural and necessary step of discussion with daughters. It centres on bodily functions which are linked to puberty and sexuality. Fathers, by contrast, do not experience equivalent marker indicating onset of puberty for sons. They are less likely to discuss sexuality with sons at appropriate and beneficial time. Fathers' role in preparing sons on sexuality is less evident and frequent [4]. Hence, boys are given little or no information about sexual changes in their bodies.
Freedom accorded boys has effect on their expression in terms of sexual debut and networking. Boys are socialsed to express their sexuality because society has placed no sexual limitations on them as girls. There is no male virginity or prostitution being positive or negative virtues respectively as in girls. Traditionally, girls were socialised to remain virgins for self-esteem, self respect, family respect, for future husband's respect and for the protection against disease and unwanted pregnancies. This discouraged premarital sex. What were the expectations from boys? Are they under sexual "immunity"? What is the implication of such socialization? The biological make-up of girls attract such imposition because most of their sexual outcomes remain public - unwanted pregnancy, school drop out, stigma, early child bearing, complication and death.
However, children should receive the same sexuality socialization for mutual knowledge and understanding for informed decision making. Although men's role in socialization has been restricted to the initial phase of the reproductive process unlike women, their impact on socialization should be fully felt by both boys and girls. The benefit is to counter-balance the strong peer and media effect on children which expresses sex through explicit or implicit messages that may be inaccurate.
Conclusion
Society is characterised by differences. It views woman as the sociobiological producer, carer and rearer of children. The socialization of boys and girls in the family will curb external imposition which sometimes negatively impact on children's sexual health. Boys often face pressure to become sexually active to prove their manhood and be accepted by their friends while pressures on girls may be from their peers, including men. As primary socializing agents, mothers and fathers should have equal responsibility in providing sexual information for their children, irrespective of their sex. Young people's sexual attitudes and expressions have thus been influenced by biological and psychological factors, parental input and sociocultural contexts upon which socialization occurs.
References
1.Markan, L.K (1999) "Socialization of Sexuality in Children: Teaching and Talking about boundaries and behaviors. www.findingstone.com/parenting/safeboundaries.htm (Assessed 20/10/2007)
2. Mundigo, A. I. (1995) " Men's Roles, Sexuality, and Reproductive Health". Address in the International Lecture Series on Population Issues sponsored by the Population Program of the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation. So Paulo, Brazil, July 31
3. Obare, F., Agwanda, A. and Madadi, M.(2006). Gender-role attitudes and reproductive health communication among females adolescents in south Nyanza, Kenya. African Population Studies Vol. 21, No. 1. pg; 37-36
4. Mundigo, A. I. (1995) " Men's Roles, Sexuality, and Reproductive Health". Address in the International Lecture Series on Population Issues sponsored by the Population Program of the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation. So Paulo, Brazil, July 31
Koblowe Obono is a Lecture in the Department of Human Communications, Bowen University, Iwo.
Oka Obono is a Senior Lecturer in the Department of Sociology, University of Ibadan.
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